Yeah, really.
I’m making all my old livejournal posts private and bringing the positivity to a new clean slate. (Even so this day has been a very stressful day in the wake of the Megaupload Cyber War.)
I am dedicating this new blog to my life, travels and career in Japan as an aspiring model and gaijin talent. I will be moving to the Mejio area of Tokyo as of Feb 2nd (omg t-minus 2 weeks).
I decided to abandon my old blog “Gingerale and Drugs” because it was too solely focused on my chronic pain and livejournal was nothing but negativity. (I will still post at lj for the more personal side of things but only selected individuals can view those anyway). I want this blog to follow me through the becoming of the new me, and all the potential I still have left despite the health issues.
Time to focus on the positive things!
Like how I just signed a 1 year local contract with Numa Models!!
So… I’m kinda legit now… HAHA !!
If you don’t know me, my name is Kristy or mysticwater (or some variation of that) as it has been my net name for the past 10 years or so.
If you have known me long enough you are probably wondering ‘Why suddenly the modeling thing? I thought she hated skirts/shoes/herself/etc?’
“It’s taken me a long time to appreciate and love myself. For the longest time I didn’t like how I looked, and I honestly thought I was ugly. It’s only been recently that I’ve learned to love myself and finally actually believe people when they tell me I’m gorgeous. Part of me wants to do this for my past self that used to hate the way she looked and let people walk all over her and every bully that ever dragged me down. But I also want others to find self-esteem like I have, and chase their dreams and pursue knowledge, never giving up when things are hard. And what better way to do that than to enter a modeling world. If I can make a career out of feeling good about myself and looking pretty I definitely want to try.” - me, 2011
I have a good chunk of experience now, a good years worth anyway. I’ve done prosthetics and runways work here in Vancouver. As well as professional workshops and photo-shoots; so I’m always looking to outdo previous shots and improve my portfolio. I am now aiming to work with other creative and talented individuals from around the world, starting with Japan.
The reason I want to be a model hasn’t changed, but I have realized this is what I truly love to do. Its my dream. I’ve never had a dream before, not one like this, one that most would believe unattainable. Writing, I love it when the writers block gives me a break, sure. But modeling and being in front of the camera makes me truly happy. You could say I don’t want to be forgotten.
Another question I get asked a lot (out of doubt of course) is ‘How are you going to live in Japan with your pain? Aren’t you scared?’
I’ve had chronic pelvic pain for the past 4 years now. I’ve had my ups and certainly plenty of downs. The chronic pain I have is pretty much classified as a syndrome or disease. It’s my nocioceptors misfiring and danger signals continuing to fire within the brain when they shouldn’t. Mood and external health are big factors when trying to manage chronic pain. It’s actually encouraged I go to a different environment and stay distracted (so long as i dont over do anything) they think its possible to reduce my pain level/threshold.
I’m going with lots of prescriptions drugs like T3s and cesamet (pot pills) for the really bad days. Pain management aside, I am scared shitless to be honest, but I need to learn to be independent or I’ll be stuck for the rest of my life. Even when it hurts I gotta push forward or there is no point in living.
But thats not what this blog is about, I’m gunna try to keep my focus off my pain best as possible, because thats not me, its just something I have to live with and most people I meet dont even notice.
A lot of people are not fortunate enough to realize what they want in life, many of them realized what they missed on their death bed. For those of us that knows what we want, the stupidest thing to do is to know what we want and not actively pursue our goal.
I found mine and I plan to grab it with all the strength I have left!
LIFE IS GREAT! BRING IT ON!
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